Sunday, 31 March 2013

Spring Break Project: "I see you"

The prompt went like this ...

“Some people turn sad awfully young. No special reason, it seems, but they seem almost to be born that way. They bruise easier, tire faster, cry quicker, remember longer and, as I say, get sadder younger than anyone else in the world. I know, for I'm one of them.”

She sees you.  
Actually, IT sees you.
So she stopped using it, the camera.  
She watched it, from time to time though, just sitting there. 
Pleading to be picked up.
Because it knew. 
The camera knew how much she loved to take pictures.  

But it was too much. 
Each time she took a photo she would see more than she should. 
More than faces and surfaces and patterns, she would see beyond eyeballs, skin and bone. 
Instead, she would bear witness to the deepest part of things she snapped.  
She would shoot someone - a stranger, a friend, a loved one, her self portrait - peer through the view finder to compose her perfect shot when the camera would tilt and focus and blur everything but what was most true about her subject at that moment.  
What was most unbearable to see were the hypocritical smiles of people she photographed.
Because underneath it all was this profound, abysmal ...
Extreme, explicable, deep, inconsolable loneliness and despair.  
It didn't matter how big and wide their smiles were. 
She would see the gaping hole that mocked and ailed them. 
The camera wouldn't let her miss it. 
And after awhile, documenting people's pain didn't sit well with her.
Not anymore.
Magical?  What was so magical about capturing that? she asked nobody.

So, she stopped picking it up.
She let it just sit there. 
Like a giant black widow spider waiting, preparing, eager to stab a little boy in the gut.

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